In A Zone...

I was working, pouring over my excel sheets and squinting at numbers that ran into 3 decimal places, when I saw this. And I just HAD to post this.

I could have saved a lot of time sharing it on my Facebook wall, but that just didn't seem enough. I felt this compelling urge to write when I saw this. Which is why this.

I am a single child and I was brought up with the knowledge that alone is not lonely. Alone is introspection time. Alone is talking to my own self. Alone is that one place when I am completely uninhibited.

Most people don't understand.

How many of us have faced these questions during those alone times?

Hey what are you thinking?

Are you alright?

Are you in a foul mood?

Are you upset?

No, I am none of these. I might as well be one of these... if you don't take your faux concern out of my zone.

Don't mistake me for a loner. I am not that. I love company. I also love lone time. It charges me up. It makes me productive. I make all my mental lists during this time. I on most occasions completely zone off... I dream... I reminiscence, I also plot... I plan... I make resolutions... I look at the sky... stare at the stars, breathe in the fresh air, listen to the birds.

I am a loner by choice... not as a result of lack of inter-personal skills. I am alone because I like it. I am alone because it is not my duty to be with people all the time, and make their life interesting. I am alone because I love my own company. 

Letting Go...

Letting go of someone and something is perhaps the most difficult thing. Goodbyes are on the contrary much easier. Goodbyes have a hope attached to them. The hope that someday our paths will cross. Someday we will sit together over a beer and talk about the good old days. Laugh. Cry. And let bygones be bygones.

Letting go means that while it tears one apart, it is perhaps necessary to ensure that we don’t lose ourselves. Letting go… it says that “I will miss it. But I realize that it is not mine to have, and I will never want to have it again.”

It is needed to let go of something to experience something new. It means that I never want to sit around wanting or hoping for it to come back. Coz while I had it, it brought nothing but pain.

Letting go is the much needed spring cleaning of our hearts and soul. Until you let go you will never know how something new or different can fill your life and world with the much needed laughter…

Let go… coz sometimes goodbyes are just not enough…

Just Happy...

I took up a challenge on FB called 100happydays. I thought, " I am in general a happy person, how difficult will it be to find a reason to be happy each day for 100 days in a row?" As it turns out... Very. 

I was not sad. I was upbeat and happy. I was just too busy to pinpoint and cherish what I was happy with? That's when it hit me... 

How many such days have I just allowed to go past? How many such moments have been lost? How many such trips between the pillar to the post have completely overshadowed those moments of simple pleasure in out lives? Many. Way too many!

Just got back from a movie... and sat down to work. And I realized that I am happy. Why? Just like that. You know there is this bubble in my heart...The kind that you feel when you fall in love for the first time. 

I am not going to dig deeper, to know why I am elated. 


I am not going to look for a reason. I am just going to enjoy this moment. 

From this minute on...I will not ask my happiness to justify its existence. From this minute on... I am no longer apologetic about who or what I am and of this feeling of contentment. 



Every now and then it’s a good thing to stop looking for happiness and just be happy. Michael Josephson

Multitasking!

I am the modern day woman.
I am the mother. I am the career woman. I am the errand boy. I am the confidante. I am the disciplinarian. I am the best friend. I am the wife. I am the cook.

I am the quintessential independent-balancing-work-family-social-life woman who is also going-mad!!!

Yes I am the independent multitasking mad woman!

And the funny part? I chose this title for myself. I could have surrendered to a relaxed monotonous life of a pampered wife, never multitasking never juggling forever focused and doing one thing at a time... and getting that right. I envy such people. They have this calmness and poise about themselves.

Not like me... who is applying lipstic... while reheating yesterday's leftover in the microwave... at the same time trying to settle some dispute between my 10 yr old and my husband.

Yes I get exhausted. Yes at the end of most days I get that feeling that the to-do list is never-ending. I go to bed with a plan of action in place as to how to handle the 10 zillion things I have taken on...

But there is always the satisfaction of that one day... once in a while... when the inbox is 0-0... the cake is baked perfectly... the diet not cheated upon... the husband happy with the quality time spent with him...the dinner guests happy with the amazing dinner we threw...the daughter proud of a Mom who helped her get an A+ in that school project...the blog is updated...etc...etc...etc And last but not the least a very happy and proud me.

A woman... who managed to transcend from being another run of the mill stay home mom to a Superwoman who can proudly say, "I am Me. I may be going crazy most days...but I still find time to be Me."

No Rules!

I started this blog six months back. I told myself I will write everyday. I will be disciplined. I was. I wrote everyday for exactly 30 days... then I realized I am handicapping myself. I am killing the exact thing that makes me what I am... A free bird.

I am setting rules for myself. Art and creativity goes out of the window the moment rules come to play. That's when I decided, "I will write when I am well and ready."

Some people can only work when there are no "shoulda...coulda...woulda" in the conversation.

Goals are meant to keep you focused. Goals should not pave your path. Goals are not the end of the line...Goals are only the beginning of the journey. That's the only way it should be.

Life is a journey. Its not a balance sheet. Its not about mental math. Its not about balancing the credits with the debits. Its about waking up every morning and making each day a more enriching an experience than the day gone by.

So from one... there will be no rules. There will be no... I hafta... There will be no... I must... There will only be..."Bring it on... I will handle!"